I grew up on MTV. I used to love, love, love it. My mom once turned the cable off because when she got home from work, I was so engrossed in my MTV that I completley missed everything she had been talking to me about for about 10 minutes. I didn’t think it was fair as it wasn’t my fault it took her 10 whole minutes to realize I wasn’t paying any attention to her…was it? In any case it was the most miserable time of my life. I was lost without my MTV. At school when my friends would talk about Bon Jovi’s latest video or how cute Mike Reno’s butt looked in those (gawdawful, what the hell were we thinking) red leather pants, all I could do was smile along, listening and longing for the now all too familiar pictures that accomanied my favorite songs. Who could forget Jon Bon Jovi and his tousled hair suspended mid air flying over the audience during the Living on a Prayer video or Madonna all dressed in white and writhing around on the floor like no virginal bride we’d ever seen. Our favorite music had taken on new meaning and our favorite musicians ahd become movie stars of sorts, acting (sometimes very badly) in their very own 3-5 minute feature films. (Unless you were Michael Jackson, in which case 3-5 minutes turned into 15-30, playboy playmate included…who the hell was he kidding? Right?) MTV had changed the way we listened to music, all day, everyday with its forever emblazoned in my mind, guy in the space suit waving as he planted his little MTV flag on the moon while the driving guitar riff played in the background. Until somewhere along the way MTV decided to fix what wasn’t broken and started adding other things, like that retarded game show called Remote Control featuring Collin what’s his name and that ridiculous Kari (pronounced Kah-ree, not to be mistaken with Carrie) Wurher, that I only suffered through until the good stuff came back on. Slowly, but oh so surley they added more and more shows until one day I turned on my MTV and the music was just gone. What had happened to the tight jean wearing guitar gods of my youth? Where did my beloved videos go? And what the hell is The Hills and what does it have to do with music? And could somebody please explain why Tyra Banks’, America’s Next Top Model reruns have been playing incessantly where Night Ranger’s, You Can Still Rock in America once used to? Is somebody kidding me?

Sadly, these past few days have found me glued to MTV once more, only this time with far less entertaining and entirely more mind numbing fodder like MTV’s Real World and the other two abovementioned shows. I really ought to just pull the plug as none of that compares to what I really want. I want MY MTV! That’s all for now.

Ciao! Hasta la pasta baby!